Dating Information

How to Overcome The Fear of Rejection


Feeling uncomfortable in the stomach, cold sweaty palm, trembling of legs, losing the ability to think correctly when approaching a girl? Hate yourself for not able to overcome this problem? Oh? please do not feel so. Believe me, you are not the only one facing this problem. In fact, this is a very common problem in man. Everyone is just like you, not willing to admit it openly, having the fear of being laughed and mocked by others. But there's absolutely nothing wrong for feeling so.

Well approaching a girl, asking her out for a date isn't really as scary as you thought. For all you may know, the girl is just as or even more nervous than you. Some guys are born with the natural flair with girls while some guys are just born shy. But that doesn't mean that they can't do as good. In fact, shy men are whom most girls are looking for. It's a pity that all the good men are hiding up leaving the girls with not much of a choice but to hang out with the jerks.

So how can you overcome your fear? Well, this is something that I can't help you. You simply just got to make that first step, that very first attempt. Hmm? still feeling too nervous? Ok, perhaps we should take things a little slower. There's actually no urgent need for you to just walk up to a girl and ask her out for a date. Too sudden? You might just scare her off. But please, don't take for ages before someone else try to cut in the queue. I don't suppose you memorized your whole school textbook before going for your exams? It's the same thing, you don't need to wait till you fully overcome your fear before you approach a girl.

Hmm? anyway, I should believe that the both of you are at least like normal friends? Classmates? Colleagues or?? Whatever it is, grab any chance to get closer to her. Too shy to strike a conversation with her? Look her in the eyes, drop her a nice warm smile. Make her notice you, make her remember you, let her know that you exist! You be surprised, your eyes can actually work more wonders than to words at times. All these will eventually boost the chance of success when approaching her at a later date. She will naturally feel more comfortable with you than to be approached by a total stranger.

Ok, now that you have done all of what you can do, no more excuses from you! Stop hiding up, it's time to make your move. Now, I want you to follow very closely after me. Take a deep breathe, gather all your courage. She is sitting all alone on the bench under the tree. Slowly and steady, you walk towards her. Yes, step by step getting nearer and nearer. She turns and saw you approaching. Remember, she has seen you before, she knows who you are. Now look her in the eyes, smile at her. She greets you with her nice gentle smile. One final step, you stop in front of her. "Hi, what a coincides to see you here", you say to her in a nice, friendly voice. "Busy with anything now? How about a little coffee together?" Smiling so sweetly at you she replies teasingly, "Your treat? Sure why not??"

Hey you still with me? Ha sorry, was just trying to play a little game of hypnosis with you. Did I fare horribly? Well anyway, it would really be so lovely if things were as what I had described? Why not? Why couldn't it be possible? You see, the problem with most people is that they always tend to create negative thoughts; creating an image of failure, an image of been rejected in their mind before things actually happen. Subconsciously, they have actually rejected themselves before anyone else could even reject them and yes, the likely chances is they will fail. Just like in soccer matches, when David Beckham scores from his spectacular free kick? If at the moment before he even lifts his feet, he was creating the image of ballooning away the ball over the goal post in his mind, you think he will score? So why not picture things the other way round, telling your mind; yourself that you are going to make it? It will definitely boosts your confidence and the chance of a success.

Hmm? hope you are feeling more comfortable and less nervous now? Well, the chance of being rejected is nonetheless still there. So what should happen if you really fail? You should learn to graciously accept the rejection. It's perfectly alright, my friend. At least you know you have tried? You finally pluck out that courage? There's nothing to feel ashamed of. Picture it this way; you are the one being approached instead. Approached by a girl that's not of your type. You would have rejected her as well, wouldn't you? But would you make fun of her, laugh and mock at her? I should believe not? Instead, you would have felt happy and thankful to her; it's just a pity that she's not your type of girl? That's exactly how the girl whom rejected you would have felt too; it's just a pity that you are not her type of guy. Nobody would be laughing at you, probably they would be admiring you for your courage instead.

Though you might be rejected but believe me, once there's a first time the rest will just come naturally. You might be sad and disappointed but once you get yourself back, you would have remembered that it wasn't as scary what you had thought. You would have probably already overcome a great deal of your fear. It's just like the first time driving out on your own after getting your license. For some unlucky ones, meeting up with a little accident. But that doesn't stop them from driving on? In fact, experiences were gained. So was confidence along the way, driving more smoothly, stepping even harder on the accelerator?

Well, rejection is part and parcel of life. It's not only in love that you get rejected. In life, you are faced with more rejections. Rejections from your work? Your boss? Your business associates? Even your own family? But that won't stop you from moving on in life?

Last but not least, there's one thing you have to accept. The fact that, you are a man! It's afterall still the guy's job to do the asking. You just gotta do it and I am sure you can do it yeah?

Rick Valens
Staff Writer
http://www.loveletterbox.com
Love Relationship Discussion Forum

NOTE: You're free to republish this article on your website, in your newsletter, in your e-book or in other publications provided that the article is reproduced in its entirety, including the author information and all live website link as above.


MORE RESOURCES:

New Zealand Herald

Toyota, Honda US Slump Ends Gains Dating to Mid-90s
Bloomberg - 11 hours ago
... than a third in December as the recession and weak consumer confidence ended annual gains for Japan’s two largest automakers dating to the mid-1990s. ...
Video: Chrysler, Toyota, Lead Declines in Auto Sales AssociatedPress
ECONOMY | US automakers lag foreign sales Chicago Sun-Times
GM’s 2008 US Sales Dive to 49-Year Low on Recession Bloomberg
all 1,972 news articles


Mate1 Dating Site - Holiday Coupon Code - 3 Months FREE!
CRN, NY - 18 hours ago
Mate1 Dating Site - Holiday Coupon Code - 3 Months Absolutely Free! Mate1 boasts a membership of over 16 million online daters with a ratio of 50% men and ...


Online Dating Sites Flirt With Record Growth
Forbes, NY - 10 hours ago
The recession may be biting into profits for most, but singles looking to save money are boosting the online dating industry. With the current downturn in ...


The Province

Carrie Underwood Dating Hockey Senator
PerezHilton.com, CA - 1 hour ago
... with Carrie and Mike's sister going out for some pre-pAArty pampering, indicating that Carrie and Mike have been dating long enough to get familiar. ...
Senators Center Mike Fisher Apparently Has No Problems With Tony ... FanIQ
Mike Fisher, Carrie Underwood romantically linked Ottawa Citizen
all 17 news articles


Find True Love in 90 Days--Really! Revolutionary Dating Book by ...
PR Web (press release), WA - 11 hours ago
Psychologist Dr. Diana Kirschner helps women answer these questions once and for all in her new dating book, Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding ...


Newsday

Facebook dating tips
Staten Island Advance - SILive.com, NY - 7 hours ago
STATEN ISLAND, NY -- Facebook rapidly is becoming a popular way for lonely hearts to meet and date, especially among younger users. ...
Facebook turned little black book? Whitney Casey thinks so! National Post
How to get men, Whitney Casey tells women HULIQ
all 7 news articles


Spike in Internet dating
MSNBC - Jan 4, 2009
FORT MYERS: While some businesses are sinking in the current economy many Internet dating sites have seen smooth sailing. Evelyn Plog is one of the lucky ...


E! Online

Are George Clooney and Paris Hilton dating?
The Week Magazine - 20 hours ago
Clooney does have “a history of dating floozies,” said Melissa Niksic in the Daily Herald, and several gossip sites are claiming that Clooney and Hilton ...
George Clooney rumoured to be dating Paris Hilton Melbourne Herald Sun
Why do Hollywood's hottest hunks settle for stupid skanks?! Chicago Daily Herald
Scandal Sheet: Clooney and Hilton? Pul-eze! National Post
Washington Post Blogs
all 15 news articles


Teen dating — outdated?
Lawrence Journal World, KS - 1 hour ago
I participated in the whole anti-dating teen dating thing that goes on these days. We didn't go on "dates" — it was hanging out. ...


Examiner.com

Dating and dining: it can still be affordable
Examiner.com - 6 hours ago
by Jessica Dean, LA Relationship Examiner I want to let you in on one of my New Year's resolutions: to spend less money. So cut up my credit cards, ...

Dating - Google News

home | site map
© 2006